COMING TOGETHER--60

It is Sunday afternoon. Jack and his fiance came by to take Mom to lunch. Thank God! What a God-send for me. I finally got away from Mom--her constant badgering questions, her harassment of my every move, her laziness. I got to go to my church without stress. I saw a few friends, I was in no hurry to be anywhere, I went to eat by myself and went to Barnes & Noble by myself.

It was such a relief, I thank God for Jack and Sarah.

But I am back now, in the apartment with Mom in the next room. She is watching opera on tv or sleeping while It type this. I know now how hard caring for the elderly is, especially in my case because I live with Mom. A care-giver gets to go home after 8 hours, with no weekends; I don't. This is making me wish more and more Mom were in a retirement home so I could see her and do things for her but still sleep and have some time to myself.

I have the afternoon in which to do nothing in particular until I work tonight. One of my big problems is not having anything great to do. I merely feed and entertain my aging mother, without any reward.

I have learned to exert myself with my mother about doing the things I want to do; I need to live my own life some of the time I am here. I've noticed how necessary this is in any relationship--you have to be yourself. So now it is my turn to do that.

But now the car issue is back. Mom has her front door key on the ring with the car key. I have hidden both from her. So now she wants her front door key. I'm going to have to either throw away her car key and tell her to give her the door key, or keep up the lie that I don't have it. I think she knows I took it. So tonight I will have to get rid of the car key. I might put it in the dumpter, I might hide it in another place or mail it to my sister.

This I will have to decide tonight.